Who needs it?

I'm so frustrated right now, mostly for inexplicable reasons, or seemly insignificant ones, like no good fanfiction to read, and no job, and the way oranges are hurting my mouth right now.

Bah... I don't know what to do with myself, and I don't want to deal with anyone. My niece is too much like me, and something about it just bothers me something awful. I think I must have a lot of hidden feelings I want to express somehow, but... If I really said what I feel and mean, would people still speak to me?

I've heard it said, "Be who you are and say what you think, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." Thing is... I don't know if people want me to be honest with them. I think mostly people are content we deluding themselves, when all I really have to offer is the unvarnished truth, so what can I say? I feel I am a slave to peoples feelings and wants, and I only do what I think they want. Part of me hates them and myself for it.

I wish I could grow up and tell them what I really want to say... and that they'd hear me. Otherwise I'm just masquerading as something else, and that's one thing I do not wish to do.

Do I maintain the silence, or speak? Which matters more? The truth as I see it, or peace?

Job Hunting

My sister has a bet going of who will get a job first, me, or my brother. First to get one gets $50. It adds a fun little incentive, and we only have two months to get the job. Unfortunately, jobs seem to be extremely scarce, if they aren't of the retail variety. I do NOT want to work in retail. Dealing with people constantly gives me a rash. Seriously. Way to internalize, me.

So, I'm trying to find a cool artsy job. It's a total pain when your experience in jobs is something like, "Two-day stint at Safeway before you had a panic attack and had to quit." I'm wondering if I ought to just suck it up and be a night shift stock person, or make a portfolio of one of my more obscure talents, sculpting Starburst candies into small fruits. I bet if I got a whole lot of them, I could make a miniature buffet table of food made ENTIRELY of Starbursts. And maybe some Airheads.

You never know, right?

Ball and Chain is love.

Hi! Welcome to the EverLoving Blog of Randomness. My name is Yunyin. I'll be your blogger this evening.

This blog was started basically because I feel like I'm going to go crazy if I don't talk about stuff.

So prepare for a lot of junk and maybe a trinket of something here and there. Monkeys typing and all that, although I think that might not actually be possible. Think I heard that somewhere. Anyway, if you want to hear about random observations, anime, TV, being an artist, Fat rights, etc, then have a seat. If not... Well, there's lots of other things for you to enjoy.

Somewhere else.