Who needs it?

I'm so frustrated right now, mostly for inexplicable reasons, or seemly insignificant ones, like no good fanfiction to read, and no job, and the way oranges are hurting my mouth right now.

Bah... I don't know what to do with myself, and I don't want to deal with anyone. My niece is too much like me, and something about it just bothers me something awful. I think I must have a lot of hidden feelings I want to express somehow, but... If I really said what I feel and mean, would people still speak to me?

I've heard it said, "Be who you are and say what you think, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." Thing is... I don't know if people want me to be honest with them. I think mostly people are content we deluding themselves, when all I really have to offer is the unvarnished truth, so what can I say? I feel I am a slave to peoples feelings and wants, and I only do what I think they want. Part of me hates them and myself for it.

I wish I could grow up and tell them what I really want to say... and that they'd hear me. Otherwise I'm just masquerading as something else, and that's one thing I do not wish to do.

Do I maintain the silence, or speak? Which matters more? The truth as I see it, or peace?